Please hand all our concerns over to God and let’s get back in alignment to the flow…
Best wishes,
Sheila
Now that that’s taken care of…
The Letter I Thought I’d Write
When I first imagined this blog post, I thought I’d write a long, sassy letter to my mind. Maybe you thought that’s where we were headed too?
I pictured teasing it for being kind of a narcissist—always trying to insert itself into everything, making life more complicated than it needs to be.
(Side-heckle to my mind: It ain’t that serious, bro.)
But instead of writing the letter, I ended up processing everything in my morning pages. And through that, some ideas started bubbling up.
Man-Powered vs. God-Powered
Ever since I published Sentenced, I’ve been filtering life through the lens of “ticket games” vs. “talent games.” That distinction has now morphed into a different question: Is this man-powered… or God-powered?
I’ve noticed that when I feel off or uncertain, it’s usually because I’ve started thinking I need to figure everything out. I start believing I must follow someone else’s formula or engineer the perfect path.
But that’s not how I create best.
My best work comes when I’m creating freely and joyfully—when I trust the process rather than pressure it. That doesn’t mean I don’t have plans or goals. But the answers rarely come on my schedule. They come through detours. They show up playfully, unexpectedly.
Pressure ≠ Progress
Looking back at old journals, I noticed a consistent stress that used to precede the completion of every project.
Sure, I got things done. Things I’m proud of. But the cost to my mental health? Not worth repeating.
Now, I know: I don’t have to suffer to make something meaningful. I can create from flow, not force.
A Useful Book
There’s this old gem of a book called The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (written in 1925!). It’s filled with anecdotal stories that sound so improbable, they’d make a skeptic snort-laugh. But if you’ve ever consciously wanted something and handed it over to a higher power—only to have it arrive in magical, unlikely ways—you start to see the logic in letting go.
One quote that sums it up for me: “Prayer is your communication with God. Intuition is God’s message back to you.”
Nudges, Detours, and the Daily To-Do List
I still stumble (often). But I’ve noticed that I’m most aligned when I act on the nudges—even the ones that take me off my “important” to-do list.
Sometimes the nudge is toward something I don’t want to do. And wouldn’t you know, those are usually the most rewarding.
Don’t Limit Your Life with a Programmed Goal
Last year I met a stranger at an event and we chatted about kriya yoga, meditation, the Silva Method, and other practices for living more consciously.
I mentioned how I’d used self-hypnosis to “program” myself toward goals. She responded with something I’ll never forget:
“What if I don’t know what to program? What if I end up choosing something smaller than I’m capable of?”
I had to agree. We would likely program ourselves according to what we imagine and our imagination is often limited by our experience. I have certainly done that.
Being Before Doing
So now I ask: What would a full-fledged life look like if it were more focused on being instead of doing??
The being is the flow. Doing arises out of that, but then is infused with universal magic.
And so, dear Mind, my short letter still holds true.
Let’s hand over what we need to hand over and let the current take us.
I didn’t mention it on my blog, but last week I finished the first draft of The AI Anomaly.
At first, I thought I’d dive right into revisions, but instead I spent the week letting the story settle in my mind. I might even give it another week before jumping back in—so I can come to it fresh when I begin shaping the next version.
I did mention last week that I have been shifting some aspects of my life to be more inline with my ideal-self (this is arising from going through The Life Quest Playbook with my co-creator and friend, Dave).
All this “creating an awesome life” stuff has really got me buzzing and shifting for optimization. Here’s what I’ve been up to:
Got a new, more powerful PC (and two shiny new monitors!)
Reorganized my room to better support my creative ventures
Sold or listed several things I no longer need—hello, space and clarity
The ideas are flowing and I’m doing my best to discern what action I take based on purpose. I certainly encounter setbacks and challenges on this journey, but I am having so much fun and finding joy in this growth.
Occasionally, I feel guilty about enjoying my life so much. That’s odd and interesting. There’s something in my programming that thinks I can’t enjoy myself if I perceive that others aren’t enjoying their life in the same way – as if I can control anyone other than myself.
Lately, I’ve felt a bit like a Transformer—shifting into whatever form I need to take to navigate the next challenge. Everything I need is already within reach… I just might have to make some adaptations along the way.
Maybe “challenge” isn’t quite the right word. It’s more like traversing the next leg of my life journey. I’m moving, learning, shifting, and then moving some more. It’s fascinating to sit back and reflect on it.
Revisiting the Life Quest Playbook
My friend Dave and I have been going through the journal we created a few years ago: 30 Day Experiment: The Life Quest Playbook. Today we completed Day 25, so we’re almost at the finish line.
Each day, we go through the prompt, make notes or doodles, then post about our experience on a website we are developing. (If you’re curious, check it out here: The Experiment Blog).
Resistance as a Signal
Going through the experiments has been helpful in keeping me present to my goals on a daily basis as well as helping me see where I might be slacking off or being resistant.
I had a realization last week that the things I am resisting are actually things that I need to turn and face fully. They are the things that I need to run towards. It reminds me of my training in the police academy. As future officers, we knew we were the ones that would be running towards potential danger in order to help other people.
In this scenario, though, I would be moving towards things that I perceive as potentially dangerous (to my ego?) in order to help me live on purpose and with joy.
Heavy. And motivating.
Shifting My Focus
I spent the latter part of last week and the weekend shifting some aspects of my life so that I can focus on two things:
Creating (in whatever form that takes)
Connecting (in whatever form that takes)
Right now, I’m still leaning more heavily into the creating than the connecting. But I’ve already cleared out a large chunk of distraction—and I plan to simplify things even more going forward.
One day, I was driving my Park Ranger truck back to my park house at the end of the day. It was the last day of work after a ten-day stretch. It was 5 PM, and I had the next four days off because by Wednesday I’d already logged 40 hours—and, best of all, I wouldn’t be on call.
When I was a Park Ranger, those days felt like the last day of school before summer break.
I was already mentally fast-forwarding to the freedom ahead—parking the truck, signing off the radio, grabbing what I needed. All the little things that would deliver me to rest and time to work on personal projects. And then it struck me: each step needed to happen in a specific order.
For example, I couldn’t park my truck while still driving the mile or so to my house. That would be…preposterous. First, I had to get to the house. Then I could park.
I’m not sure I’m explaining this perfectly, but in that moment, it made me laugh. I realized how often I expect things in my life to happen instantly, even though I know—logically—that some things take time. There’s a natural progression, and I don’t have to struggle through it. I can just enjoy “the drive home,” knowing the outcome is inevitable.
That idea has been sitting with me this week as I move through the steps of writing my books and creating the other things I feel nudged to bring into the world.
Some days, I want to rush. I get frustrated wondering why things aren’t happening faster. But then I remember:
I can’t park the truck until I get to the house.
I can’t go inside until I park.
And I can’t take off the uniform until I’m inside the house. (Okay, technically I could…but personally, I wouldn’t!)
Steps, steps, steps.
That’s where I’m at this week. I’m not in the reward phase of finishing a project, but I’m on the way. I’m moving in the right direction.
I mentioned in an earlier post how I was considering mirroring my workflow and writing plans to the seasons. If I were following that now, I would be planning and writing in the fall and winter.
I still love that idea and expect to return to it—but not just yet. First, I need to bring The AI Anomaly into the world.
I was trying to take my time with the writing, but this story wants out and it wants out now. I guess birthing stories is like birthing babies in that respect. When the gestation is done, the baby is coming. No point in resisting it, eh?
So, I’ve shifted my focus into making this happen sooner rather than later. I’m not trying to burn myself out in the process. My goal is to write 2–3 chapters a day (on weekdays) until I have a solid draft. Once that’s complete, I’ll be able to confidently announce a release date. That way, I’ll have plenty of time for editing and feedback from beta readers.
I’m looking forward to it—and I hope you are too. This “kid” is special to me.
